Friday, September 2, 2016

"Efforting"

As you know every September I get this autumn bug, this back to school buzz where I want to start something fresh and new. However as this September kicked off with a whopping big ole Mercury in Retrograde, this ain't the time to start something new. However, it is a great time for a rewind, hold the phone, kick you in the pants, do over!

Now take a walk with me if you will, back through the past eight months. Yes that's right, we're in the home stretch, the big push, the final countdown of 2016 so this feels like a good time to take stock. Yeah yeah I know that most of you would prefer to do this on December 31st but not me. I wanna do it now. As mentioned in my previous post I've had the snot, the stuffing, the begeezus kicked out of me and I'm still standing, a little worse for wear sure, but hopefully a little bit wiser.

I've learned that "efforting" gets you nowhere. Yes it's a thing! I'm not saying that you shouldn't make an effort. Go after your dreams, pursue your goals, strive for something greater yada yada yada, but all that pushing can lead to a whole lot of stress and not always a lot of reward.

Now I for one have chosen one of the dumbest professions in the world and when I say dumbest I mean it's so hard to break into and make a living that you'd have to be a dumb dumb to do it. And I am. But the thing is, this past year (oh fuck who am I kidding, this past decade) I've done nothing but press and push and keep the pedal to the metal, strive for achievement that I'd lost sight of why I began to write in the first place. I've even pushed my health to the brink, but that's a story for another day. I had to stop and reexamine my motivation and I can promise you that I didn't become a writer to "try and get noticed" or "land that big TV gig" but that's what I'd become! Gag, it was/is exhausting. I just want to sit in my room and make shit up!

So as I really stop to think things through, Mercury Retrograde couldn't come at a better time for me. I just want to take a breather. I want to have some fun. I want to let go, let loose and stop all this efforting!

Don't get me wrong, starting next week I will become busier than a bee in a hive but that doesn't mean I have to squeeze the life out of myself to get it all done. Rather it's my new belief that I can ease and flow my way through. Find my groove, be myself, use my voice and create with an air of freedom and fun. This is a new concept for me so lets see if I can pull it off.

Who's with me? You up for going with the flow for a lil bit? Ready to let go, to surrender to something bigger than us? It's like Marianne Williamson says: The bud knows how to become a flower, the embryo knows how to become a baby, the acorn just grows into the oak tree, if we let go and slip into the stream of life's buoyant energy we are sure to become whatever it was that we were designed to be.



So that's it, noble reader, the virtue for the month of September is SURRENDER. No more "efforting". Told you it was a thing.

Stay cool.
xoxo
Shan