Tuesday, June 28, 2016

Ninety Days!

Today is a day for celebration. It's one of the few times in my life that I am not too shy or modest to pat my own back and drink a toast in my own honor, for this day marks a huge achievement in my life.

I have gone (not without major struggle) ninety days without sugar. So cheers! Cheers to good health, freedom from sugar addiction, and the knowledge that we can change, we can make better choices, and we can live the life of our dreams.



This is on my desk and I'm drinking it as we speak. (or as I type and you read)

I could never have done it alone. I've had loads of help and support along the way. I have to thank Emery for introducing me to That Sugar Film it showed me why I had to do this. Thanks Elise, Jenne, Leslie, Natalia, Amy, Sophie, Justine - you all have made a major difference in helping me stay on track, in motivating me to keep going, reminding me why this is so important and even though we are all on different paths, some of you are able to now eat sugar and moderate it, others (you know who you are) are addicts like me and hope to be sugar free for life... I owe you a massive debt of gratitude. (God, this is like an Oscar speech or something)

So I raise this glass to you ladies. And to you Myla because you are just so darn good at being a cheerleader and healthy eater and one day I will learn to dance and we'll dance together!

Thanks so much for giving me this precious safe place to come and share the victories, the struggles, the rants, and the good times. I feel very blessed this fine Tuesday.

xo
Shan



Friday, June 24, 2016

TAK

I don't know what it is, but it would seem that all roads lead me back to fitness, and health, and wellness, and taking action toward those ends. I grew really tired of only writing about fitness on my old BLOG, so I started this new one to talk about other stuff and yet here I am about to launch into more fit info. Can you even believe it?

What can I say I love a good workout!

The title of this post is TAK. What the hell is that you may be asking. Patience noble reader, isn't that part of the fun of reading?

If you know anything about me at all, it's most likely the fact that I am a long time Tracy Anderson Method junkie. Love her, love her workouts, love all of the guidance and support that she has provided over the years that I have been doing her workouts. She not only helped me lose those twenty pounds that crept on after marriage... you've heard of the freshman twenty right? That's where you go off to college and eat all the shit your parents forbid you from consuming in copious amounts, you party, drink and of course study, and then you pack on the pounds. Well there is a thing in later life too it's called heavily ever after and it happens after you tie the knot. You're just so dang blissful and happy you lie around in bed and feed each other cake then BAM, same thing you pack on the pounds. 


But I digress.

I was neck deep in my heavily ever after when I learned about Tracy Anderson on Oprah or someplace (like we all did back then I believe) and I started with her Mat DVD, this is old news though. You know all this. If you don't, feel free to click the link above, I've spent a good five years of my life writing about it! I stuck with her and while I have had my ups and downs with dieting, kicking sugar, falling off the wagon, then kicking it again (86 days sugar free and going strong) I've managed to mostly keep those pounds off. Not all of them mind you, but for the majority of the past six years, over half. Not a bad average.

Still, I'm getting older and things they are a changin'! My metabolism is starting to slow down in a real way and a few things have shifted around my mid-section. Now before I go any further, I want to state it loud and clear that I am and always will be a Tracy Anderson Method devotee. I am never giving that girl up. She promised me that she was going to be doing this into her 80's well Tracy, I'm going to be doing it right along with you.

However, that said, a few elements of the workout have changed. If you're familiar with Tracy's work, you know that she is always evolving and honing her Method. I have a unique body type. Well Duh, Shan we all do! Yeah yeah, but I mean I am thick around the middle. Even when I'm thin, my mid section goes up and down it does not curve in at the waist. It likely never will but I certainly do not need any additional musculature happening around that area so I have really had to tailor my streaming workouts to avoid some of those oblique challenging moves.

Allow me to take you back to 18 months ago when Tracy launched her online streaming workouts. This took us from working out at home along with one of her pre-recorded DVD workouts, to working out live with her (still at home) while she filmed her actual studio classes. Along with this launch she had a streaming contest where a whole bunch of at-homers got to connect with one another and it was here that I met the amazing and contagiously happy Emily Kirsch. You can find her HERE.

She was onto Tracy in the early days and the girl just has her thumb on the pulse of all things fitness. It was Emily who turned me onto a new trainer that she'd been working with who she had fallen madly in love with. Katia Pryce of DANCEBODY.

Now listen, I've had a lot of people tell me about a lot of trainers over the years, but Tracy was the one for me. There was no one else. I mean I love and adore Anna Kaiser one of Tracy's former trainers, but her workouts were not for me. Then there is Body by Simone and Yin in the Zone. I'm sure these ladies are all terrific and are absolutely the right trainer for someone, they are just not for me. I am not a trend hopper. At least not anymore. If you'd talked to me seven years ago I'd have told you I'd done them all, Jillian Michaels, Chalene Johnson, P90X etc. and none of them worked for me. But now I am a TAM girl through and through.

Which brings me back to Katia.

She too is a former trainer of Tracy. Emily directed me to her website and I tried the couple of tutorials that she had there with some simple dance routines. They aren't on the site anymore sadly, but guess what? Low and behold I was able to follow along. This girl could teach this old dog a new trick. I mean not only am I am old dog, I'm an old dog with two left feet. I could never do Tracy's dances. My brain just didn't operate that way. But something about the breakdown and four count and balance from left to right with Katia made me think there was hope for me yet!

Katia began offering free periscope workouts, both sculpt and cardio. At first I was only in it for the cardio because you know me, I hate the dance cardio and that hate is compounded further by the fact that I cannot dance. But I really want to be able to dance so this was a way for me to possibly learn. However, as time marched on, I found myself trying the sculpt classes and absolutely loving them. I began to really tailor by workouts between Tracy and Katia and I'm actually starting to notice a shift around my midriff. It's... SHRINKING!!!! I can't believe it.

All this time off sugar, giving up gluten, no processed foods and I still had a muffin top. I'm back into my original skinny jeans people. The ones I got into at the end of The 30-Day Method!!!

So what do I do? I do the arm section of Tracy's live stream class, a wee bit of cardio with Katia, like maybe one song or two on a good day, and then I do between 30 and 50 minutes of her legs depending on which periscope class I'm following. Now I know what you're thinking: fat lot a good that does me, I haven't been doing her periscopes!

Good news noble reader, Katia - KPDANCEBODY is about to start her own streaming and you do not have long to wait. She is launching it on Monday June 27th!!!! Isn't that so exciting!?!! I absolutely cannot wait.

So has it clicked in yet? Have you figured out why the post is called TAK??

It's my new preferred method of movement. Tracy Anderson and Katia T.A.K.
I love it!


Aren't they just adorable? Don't you want to hug them both? I LOVE these girls.
Now before I go I've got to get one small thing off my chest...

When these periscope classes first launched, there was a young lady on Instagram who sent out a call about loyalty. It's a topic I know a thing or two about being a fiercely loyal person to the people I love and respect! What this young lady was suggesting was that if you are someone who does the Tracy Anderson Method or TAM as it's been shortened to, then you should not partake in Katia's workouts because there was bad blood between the two former colleagues.

To that young lady I say: Whatever happened between these two women is absolutely none of my business. It's got nothing to do with me. You telling me if I am doing one I cannot do the other is the equivalent of saying that if I shop at Saks I'd better not be caught shopping at Macy's.

I am a TAK girl all the way! 



xo
Shan



Monday, June 13, 2016

The WHEAT Post

Yep, it's Monday. Again. How the heck did the last week slip by without me writing the wheat post? I have been promising to write about what I'd learned about wheat and gluten specifically for ages, but for some reason I was starting to dread it. Because let's face it, you hear gluten and you think: oh yeah, another demon food, wasn't fat just the enemy yesterday and now that's all we're eating? 

Yes. True. But hear me out okay? Or not. You can go, you don't have to read this if you don't want to.

Knowing what I know about wheat now and thinking back, all of the childhood issues that I suffered with for years and years with no relief are starting to make sense! 

So here's a little backstory.

I grew up in Saskatchewan. No idea where that is? It's the middle of Canada and it's known as the breadbasket of the county. Why? Because it's prairie farmland for as far and the eye can see. We grow a lot of stuff there, but wheat is a big one.


When the wheat is ready to be harvested, the days before it's cut, if the wind blows just right, it looks like waves tumbling over a golden ocean. It's glorious. I get homesick just thinking about it.

Anyway...

As I child I suffered a variety of seemingly unrelated physical ailments. I constantly had stomach troubles but it was never the same trouble two days in a row. If on Monday I was constipated, Tuesday I could have the runs, but Thursday might bring bloating and abdominal pain so severe I could hardly move. Add to that migraine headaches, moodiness (I was so not a morning person), I was always tired, and canker sores? Oh man did I suffer. There were times I might have three or four at a time. 


I also remember being annoyed by the appearance of little white bumps all over the backs of my arms and my great aunt Mary telling me I needed to scrub harder in the tub. I would rub that skin raw with a wash cloth and still they would not go away.

My mom, bless her, she had me to every doctor and specialist that you could think of, we even traveled two and a half hours away from home to the province capital to see GI doctors. Their conclusion? I was a nervous child. I'm sorry but isn't that the equivalent of doctors one hundred years ago calling any disease that affected a woman "Hysteria". Such utter bullshit. Something was wrong with me and just because it didn't show up in their tests, it was all in my head? Want to know what I'd say to them now? ---

Never mind it's a bit too crude. But it definitely has the F-word in it and a place they can shove their tests. Ahem. But allow me to get on with this post.

First a word from our Gluten expert  Dr. Tom O'Brian (Dr. Tom or Dr. T aka the Gluten Guy):

There’s a lot of confusion about gluten sensitivity. Some say it doesn’t exist. Others think going gluten free without celiac disease is unnecessary and is just a fad. But science now confirms what gluten sensitive patients and their doctors have known for years: Gluten sensitivity is a real disorder with defined symptoms that can affect any part of the body. 

The gluten protein in wheat, barley, and rye causes numerous health problems in susceptible individuals. Gluten-Related Disorders (GRD)are conditions that are triggered by gluten. Celiac disease is the most well-known GRD. It’s an autoimmune condition that results in tissue damage in the small intestine. NonCeliac Gluten Sensitivity (NCGS) is another Gluten-Related Disorder. People with gluten sensitivity develop symptoms after eating gluten, but the immune reaction is different than the one that occurs in celiac disease. 

Non-Celiac Gluten Sensitivity is more common than celiac disease. Many patients with either celiac disease or Non-Celiac Gluten Sensitivity do not know they have the condition. There’s a surprising fact about Non-Celiac Gluten Sensitivity: Most of its symptoms occur outside of the intestines and gastrointestinal tract! 

(Ha! Take that you lousy specialists who told me everything that was happening to me was a result of me being a "sensitive child".)

How do we know? In a new study, researchers from Italian medical centers that specialize in the diagnosis and treatment of Gluten-Related Disorders identified nearly 500 patients with suspected NonCeliac Gluten Sensitivity. They used patients’ reported symptoms, lab tests, intestinal biopsy results (if performed), and other factors to identify those who were sensitive to gluten. The most common symptoms reported in gluten-sensitive people
included: 
• Bloating (87%) 
• Abdominal pain (83%) 
• Lack of well being (68%) 
• Tiredness (64%) 
• Headache (54%) 
• Diarrhea (54%) 
• Nausea (44%) 
• Anxiety (39%) 
• Brain fog (38%) 
• Numbness (32%) 
• GERD (32%) 
• Joint/muscle pain (31%) 
Gluten-sensitive people in the study also experienced constipation, rashes, weight loss, anemia, depression, mouth sores, and more. More women than men suffered from gluten sensitivity, by a ratio of more than 5 to 1. The average age of the patients was 38. Nearly half of the patients had irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) while 35% reported food intolerance. Almost 1 in 5 patients had a relative with celiac disease. Researchers reported that 14% of gluten-sensitive people in the study had an autoimmune disease, most commonly autoimmune thyroiditis. 

Sadly, the majority of people with Gluten-Related Disorders are undiagnosed and untreated. Do you have Non-Celiac Gluten Sensitivity? If you have symptoms, see a healthcare practitioner with extensive knowledge in the diagnosis and treatment of Gluten-Related Disorders. Functional medicine practitioners have experience with newer specialized tests that can help diagnose these conditions. You can also try a 3-week trial period of a gluten-free diet. If your symptoms improve when you avoid gluten, but they return soon after you reintroduce gluten into your diet, you may be gluten sensitive. If that’s the case, you would benefit from being on a gluten-free diet permanently. 

Proper diagnosis and treatment are key. Gluten-Related Disorders like celiac disease and Non-Celiac Gluten Sensitivity contribute to intestinal permeability, more commonly known as “leaky gut.” And leaky gut, in turn, sets the stage for autoimmune disease and other conditions. In future articles, we’ll discuss how gluten triggers these processes. 

So this just goes to show how gluten can damage areas in your body beyond your gut, but why do I care? I mean apart from the fact that I have so obviously been sensitive to gluten my entire life? What got me onto this topic? Why fat loss of course. Dr. Tom was part of that FAT LOSS SUMMIT I was referring to during my earlier posts about the Always Hungry Solution (AHS).

Wheat, like dairy or soy or sugar triggers INFLAMMATION!


I can't seem to get enough information on the subject, I am always hungry for more because I really want my body to function at it's optimal level. When you're in your twenties and even your thirties to some extent, you can trash your body and it magically recovers, it seems to bounce back to better than before. This is so not the case in your forties and beyond. Things wear out, they start to break down, and they need more care and attention. I have no idea how old I will grow, but I can tell you one thing; I don't want to be decrepit.

My great aunti Anne is in her 80's, and while she is going through a battle with her health at the moment, she is so strong and resilient. Why? Because all of her life she's had an amazing positive bright can-do attitude, she's eaten healthy foods and taken in the not so good stuff in moderation (she'll have an occasional beer or piece of cake, but never over-does it) and she has remained incredibly physically active. She's a folk dancer. Even as she is working through her current health ordeal, she has gotten out to dance with her group. I love her and am so inspired I want to age the way she has, so gracefully and well.

Wheat and gluten want to stand in the way of that and here's how.

Disease is inflammation at a cellular level. Stop inflammation you stop disease. So how does inflammation happen? That's a massive subject and far too big to discuss within the scope of a single blog post so lets stick to wheat's role in inflammation shall we? Wheat causes intestinal permeability and loss of oral tolerance (immune unresponsiveness). But how?

This is how Dr. Tom described the process. Imagine your intestine as this big long massive tube that is lined with shag carpet. Now imagine that this shag is covered with cheese cloth. So as food is being broken down and digested, the molecules are moved along this tube along the carpet, certain sized molecules get through the cheese cloth and into the bloodstream via the little finger-like bits of your shag carpet. Ideally these molecules are your vitamins and minerals, things the body needs to function. Then the bigger molecules travel further along through enzymes that break them down until they are small enough to be dealt with appropriately.

But wheat comes along and it causes tears in your cheese cloth. Yikes. However, like a snake skin that sheds and regrows very quickly, your cheese cloth repairs itself. So, according to Dr. T, it heals, tears, heals, tears (your 20's and 30's) until one day it doesn't heal and chaos ensues. Your shag carpet is now mere berber. The wheat gets through and hits the bloodstream. Naturally the body views this as an invader (because it is) and it makes antibodies, as you know if you've been reading along with previous posts, the antibodies create inflammation which creates fat, which creates more antibodies and before you know it you're on the hamster wheel thinking you're doing everything right, diet exercise et al and you're still abcentric!

This process continues until you've got leaky gut or intestinal permeability, so now lots of different molecules are escaping through these tears and getting into the bloodstream and you're no longer just sensitive to gluten. Suddenly you might find that you're lactose intolerant where you never were before, or you're reacting to all sorts of foods that you used to enjoy all the time. Because as these molecules are getting into your bloodstream your body is fighting everything as if it were being attacked. If this is allowed to continue you may find yourself at the wrong end of an autoimmune disorder and you might even be a kid who has a doctor telling her she is just over-sensitive or that it's all in her head. (I'm sure I'll get over this some day, but this is new info so I'm still doing my booty dance of victory, in your face losers!)

Now you might be thinking it's all hopeless. You don't want to give up gluten forever. You think, I'll just get off it, allow my gut to heal and then I'll be okay. Nope. One exposure to wheat will trigger elevated antibodies that can leave you suffering for 3-6 months! One exposure! That's the wrong soy sauce at a sushi restaurant, that one piece of pizza, that tiny bite of a cookie! It's no bueno!! These antibodies can affect your heart or even your brain. Serious stuff noble reader. I should know, a year ago February I landed in emergency with pericarditis.


Not my best look to be sure!

I'm not trying to scare you. I'm asking you to be more tolerant of those around you who become hyper aware of the nutrient content of everything and say no thank you to gluten! 

I'm asking you to look at yourself, to check in and ask: Am I feeling okay? Is that headache really stress? Do I feel tired all the time because I'm getting older? Are my joints really achy because of age? Or could there be something else going on?

There is no reason we can't all be dancing up a storm into our 80's too, so why not do a trial, take three weeks to eliminate some of these trigger foods from your diet beginning with Gluten.

Here's to your great health.
xo
Shan




Monday, June 6, 2016

Compassion? Ethics? Choices?

Can you even believe that Monday has rolled around so quickly? Damn, I'm not ready. But this is the week, I swear it, that I am going to finish this new screenplay so that I can start to tweak and needle and rewrite - my favorite part of the work.

But in the mean time I wanted to pop in here and talk to you about some changes that are afoot in my world.

Are any of you familiar with the 2003 documentary film THE CORPORATION? If you've not seen it, I highly recommend it. Yes 2003 is a long time ago, but that film is as current today (sadly) as it was then. I think you can even watch it free on Youtube. In any case, there was a segment in the film about dairy and the evil corporation Monsanto. It got me thinking about dairy and my choices as a consumer.

For over two decades I was a vegetarian, I swore I would never eat anything with parents or a face. 


I have often wondered why we have organizations around rescue and humane treatment of one of these animals yet think it's perfectly okay to put the other on the stove or in the oven. That's kinda fucked up.

I chose the vegetarian lifestyle out of compassion for animals. I decided that I would not eat anything that I couldn't kill myself. As I have no desire to kill a pig, chicken, lamb, or cow, I would not eat them. A couple of years of living on the West Coast of British Columbia had me indulging in the occasional bit of freshly caught wild salmon. It's very much a part of the culture out there. But when moving back to Ontario a year ago, I continued to eat fish and now I was eating not only salmon, but Tuna (dolphin friendly, pole caught) halibut and shrimp. I guess I sort of reasoned with myself that I'd done my fair share of fishing as a kid and did kill the fish and fry it up. So my theory of compassion sort of evolved. (not the best choice of words, perhaps devolved is better). But seeing this documentary and how these cows were abused and in pain got me thinking, wow I need to stop eating dairy and why does a fish not deserve the same compassion as the chicken or cow? 

However I got stuck on my cup of tea. What? Yeah, my tea. Since giving up sugar, my morning cuppa just ain't the same but it's drinkable. OR it was until I tried it with almond milk. Gross. Coconut milk. Nope. Forget soy, not even going there. Milk is the only thing that makes the tea even remotely drinkable. Yet am I okay with torturing a cow for a cup of tea? No. I am not.

First things first, some decisions needed to be made. Is it ethical to eat fish when I don't eat meat for compassionate reasons? How is a dolphin worth protecting but a tuna isn't? Decision made. Once the fish I have on hand is consumed, I will not be buying more. I am returning to a vegetarian lifestyle. I am not suggesting that everyone in the world do this, I am saying this is the right choice for me. But could I be a vegan? He Who Shall Not Be Named is vegan, so it's not like it would be a super hard decision in my family. However, many of the foods I loved as a vegetarian I can no longer eat because they contain soy and wheat. (Ah, there's the WHEAT post reminder again, I'll get there Janice I promise). So no tofu, no tempeh, no tofurkey, not a lot of veggie burger options as most contain eggs, what to do?

I did my research on the organic dairy company that I get my milk from. Turns out that they are a co-op made up of small family run local farms. Some produce organic feed that in turn feed the free range antibiotic hormone free cows that provide milk. I looked at photos of the farms and the families and read the bios and practices and it all seems very sustainable and nice. Of course they are not going to put up pics of sick cows or anything like that. But still.

On the other hand, the good and noble folks at PETA say that animals are not here for us to consume, wear or be entertained by. I do agree (mostly), I think my dog is pretty entertaining.


And I also happen to think my girl Myla's dog is very entertaining. Check him out HERE. He's all business.

Yet when I think of what these small farms are doing I sort of like them. Yes they are making a living off the backs of animals but are those animals not living a pretty decent life because of that? Would they exist or be slaughtered otherwise? I'm genuinely asking your thoughts dear reader. Do you think it might be a worthwhile endeavour to support our local farms so that big industry or corporation owned operations cannot muscle their way onto our land to mistreat the animals, generate harmful waste and abuse the land with all their chemicals and pesticides etc?

Or should we just turn our backs on the use of animals altogether and survive without them on a purely plant based diet? That's the bigger question.

He Who Shall Not Be Named and I took a long walk this morning and we wandered through a beautiful neighborhood here in Toronto with large homes and expansive yards. As we walked we dreamed of living in such a place and I posed a question to him. What if we were to live in a place like this and keep chickens? We could care for them and love them and feed them well and give them a good standard of living - in other words have happy chickens. Would you eat the eggs then? He considered this and his answer was yes. So knowing that the chickens are well cared for and loved and happy gives us an opportunity to enjoy an egg at breakfast. I understand that we can't all each own our chickens. And in the early days perhaps this was how trade happened. One person had chickens and another had a cow with milk and someone else grew the veggies and everyone traded and fed one another. Yes, that's an ideal world. Then the corporation came.

I guess I am toying with the idea of veganism but I'm not there yet. I am a selfish girl who wants her cup of tea as she sits at her computer making up stories. But I kind of take some pleasure in the thought that I am perhaps providing entertainment to those who provide me with an egg or milk for my tea. Am I living in a fantasy world? Or could we go back to this way of being if we made the choice to support local and organic and sustainable small business. Ooooooh, we could even shop locally for clothing and other items thereby eliminating the need for foreign sweat shops and child labor. I dunno, just musing I suppose.

I'd love to hear what you think.
Have a great week.
xox
Shan



Wednesday, June 1, 2016

The Closing Chapter

Happy June!

Don't you just love a new month? I know, me too. Clean slate, fresh start, new virtue, new energy. It's a field of all possibilities.



I mean doesn't that image just crack your heart wide open? It's like heaven. This is what I imagine nearly every single month as I flip over the page in my calendar to the next new month. Endless possibility. I love it. Last month I chose to RECEIVE as my virtue because I find it difficult to take even a simple compliment, this month I am choosing AUTHENTICITY as my virtue. 

Yep, it's pretty much Shamandment number 1, Be Shannon. So there I am, the girl who imagines her life as a valley of wildflowers in the foothills of some mythical mountain at sunrise. Or is that sunset? Either way, wildflowers under sherbet skies. How's that? That's me. The dreamer.

So as we embark upon this new month it felt fitting to bring to a close the chapter in my life I have lovingly entitled My Solution. You can read the entire story HERE.

After four weeks on the AHS, what conclusions have I come to? Adding more fat to my diet has definitely helped me out with the sugar cravings. I'm a week away from 70 days sugar free. I'm talking super sugar free, no honey, no maple syrup, no dates, no crutches. Honestly, I'd have thought that just that on it's own would have made me shed the weight in no time. He Who Shall Not Ne Named has been vegan since early February and he would have thought that the weight would have just dropped off his frame too, but no.

So what are my physical results then? In terms of weight, the jury was out on that because of the scale conundrum which you can read about in my previous post. It's not good. Not good at all. I weigh exactly six ounces less than when I started four weeks ago according to my original scale with new batteries. Boo! Seven pounds still to lose. But on the positive side, Dr. Dave did deliver on his promise to shrink my mid-section. While he hasn't exactly earned the title of Muffin Top Slayer for outstanding performance, (that championship belt still belongs to Ms. Tracy Anderson), he did deliver results. I lost 1.5 inches off my midsection. The rest of my body remained, to my chagrin exactly the same. Hips, thighs, chest, arms, et al, no change. So effectively I think the real changes occurred within. Or at least I hope they have. I am imagining my internal organs having a bit more room to breathe with some of the fat gone.

I do have a greater sense of well-being, I am no longer dominated by cravings apart from the odd one during PMS, and I think I have found a stable and sustainable way to eat... now all I have to do is figure out how to lose 7 pounds without fucking everything up. Insert a worried emoticon here why don't you.

In answer to my Big Why? The things I had to list as reasons for doing this?
A) Mental freedom from being dominated by sugar cravings. Check.
B) Converting my body into a fat burner rather than a sugar burner. No clue apart from perhaps my slightly smaller waist? So maybe a Check?
C) Want to unwind all the damage of years eating like a teenager. It's definitely a start. So Check.
D) Radiant health, loads of energy, mental clarity and freedom from pain. I'm going to go with Ish. Check-ish. I feel slightly better but feel like I still have a ways to go.
E) Vanity, I have always wanted to rock a six-pak. Don't wanna be abcentric no more. Sadly, 1.5 inches off does not a six-pak make.

Four-ish out of five ain't bad.

It was a fun experiment and I think the reading and research I've done this past month will inform many future choices and hopefully I will continue to gain clarity and energy and drop the last few pounds without driving myself mad.

And yes, I owe you a post on WHEAT dammit. I know. Just find your way into the valley of flowers for now, for that's where you'll find this dreamer as she hammers out the last third of this new movie called LIFE WON'T KEEP.

Big hugs.
Shan